Lockport Union-Sun & Journal Online

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January 9, 2014

VALLEY: Reservations about the New Year

Lockport Union-Sun & Journal — My reservations are set for next New Year’s 

Every New Year’s Eve I have reservations. I have reservations about watching the new year arrive on live TV.

But last week, after the last football game, I took the somewhat obligatory peek at what was being offered up as the annual celebratory whoop-dee-doo year’s-end/year’s-start bash.

Like I said, it is live TV and who knows what might happen?

When I turned on CNN, a little after 11 o’clock, Anderson Cooper, Kathy Griffin and Melissa Etheridge were huddled together in Times Square. That’s swell, but I tried another channel.

The pretentious frivolity there (CNN) was a little too transparent. No one should be that happy in such frigid temperatures simply because they’re going to start using a new calendar.

Flipping the channel, I found Ryan Seacrest. Recognizing it as the network that once carried Dick Clark, I switched again. I was terrified they might roll out an embalmed Clark. It would be a bad undertaking, if they did. (Not unlike the intended pun.)

Don’t pass that off as far-fetched. Several years ago, Clark, after suffering a devastating stroke, went on the air, fooling no one with his “nothing’s-wrong-with-me” disguise.

His adherence to “the show must go on” code of entertainment was as unsettling to watch as the space-shuttle catastrophe. How was someone supposed to revel in a party atmosphere, when seeing “America’s oldest teenager” — whose forte was his warm ambiance and ability to communicate — struggle just to complete a sentence? It was more like witnessing the death of your own youth. Too sad to watch and too sad to be ignored.

So I nixed Ryan.

The next channel I switched to had on that lady from the TV show “Glee.” I don’t know her name. But for some reason, she scares the hell out of me. I always get the feeling she’s going to beat me up. I’ve never seen her look happy.

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