Lockport Union-Sun & Journal Online

Columns

October 3, 2013

VALLEY: Lights out on another weekend project

Lockport Union-Sun & Journal — I decided to take on a project last weekend. I don’t mind doing such if some form of carpentry is involved. I like to design and build unique items — something that is tailor-made to whatever the situation calls for. I call it carpentrating. 

I have my own little shop in a separate (from the house) building out back. 

Originally, this building was supposed to be a shed. It was intended to house the lawnmower, garden tools and an assortment of space-hogging items which my wife refuses to throw out. Refuses because “we might need them sometime.” (Like a croquet set with only half a mallet, 2 chipped wooden balls and 4 pieces of useless, twisted wickets.)

Kidding … somewhat. Nonetheless, my wife is the grounds-keeper of the household. And she’s good at it. She loves gardening and I never question her decisions about such matters … not out loud. The problem is, she always has poison ivy. Well, at least, it seems that way. She is so susceptible, I think she can catch it from Chia Pets. I feel bad for her. (And you didn’t think I had a heart.)

But as I started to say, I kind of took over her building by loading it up with my power tools. And as the Bible, Abraham Lincoln and Sid Bloomberg (a real-estate agent on the San Andreas Fault) noted “A house divided cannot stand.” Thus, the gardening stuff had to go.

But, actually, with my new shop in place, I was able to quickly build another small building for the yard stuff. (I did, however, have to re-build it several times — it’s just so hard to get good duct tape these days.)

So, back to my project. I decided to re-do my bedroom closet. Mind you: this was not my wife’s closet nor any other part of the house. To attempt doing some sort of task other than in my own little niche of the world would entail more compliance and approval than an act of congress. Passing federal legislation is a mere bag of shells compared to making a suggestion and getting the green light from my wife about doing something in any other area of the house. Apparently, she’s not fond of bent-over nails and gray tape. I’m not complain’ – I’m just explaining.

Text Only
Columns
Featured Ads
Photos


Twitter Updates
Follow us on twitter
Front page
AP Video
US Airlines Cancel Israel Flights Obama Signs Workforce Training Law Crash Victims' Remains Reach Ukraine-held City Diplomatic Push Intensifies to End War in Gaza Obama Offers Condolences at Dutch Embassy Cat Fans Lap Up Feline Film Festival Raw: Lawmakers Scuffle in Ukraine's Parliament The Rock Finds His Inner 'Hercules' Michigan Plant's Goal: Flower and Die Raw: MH17 Passenger Remains in Kharkiv, Ukraine Raw: Israel Hits Gaza Targets, Destroys Mosques ShowBiz Minute: Hoffman, Oberst, Box Office WWII Vet Gets Medals, 70 Years Late Raw: Israel Bombs Multiple Targets in Gaza Veteran Creates Job During High Unemployment Raw: Cargo Craft Undocks From Space Station Widow: Jury Sent Big Tobacco a $23B Message New Orleans Plans to Recycle Cigarette Butts UN Security Council Calls for MH 17 Crash Probe Obama Bestows Medal of Honor on NH Veteran
Seasonal Content
Hyperlocal Search
Premier Guide
Find a business

Walking Fingers
Maps, Menus, Store hours, Coupons, and more...
Premier Guide
AP Video
US Airlines Cancel Israel Flights Obama Signs Workforce Training Law Crash Victims' Remains Reach Ukraine-held City Diplomatic Push Intensifies to End War in Gaza Obama Offers Condolences at Dutch Embassy Cat Fans Lap Up Feline Film Festival Raw: Lawmakers Scuffle in Ukraine's Parliament The Rock Finds His Inner 'Hercules' Michigan Plant's Goal: Flower and Die Raw: MH17 Passenger Remains in Kharkiv, Ukraine Raw: Israel Hits Gaza Targets, Destroys Mosques ShowBiz Minute: Hoffman, Oberst, Box Office WWII Vet Gets Medals, 70 Years Late Raw: Israel Bombs Multiple Targets in Gaza Veteran Creates Job During High Unemployment Raw: Cargo Craft Undocks From Space Station Widow: Jury Sent Big Tobacco a $23B Message New Orleans Plans to Recycle Cigarette Butts UN Security Council Calls for MH 17 Crash Probe Obama Bestows Medal of Honor on NH Veteran
Seasonal Content
Helium debate
Helium
Section Teases

Seasonal Content
Parade
Magazine

Click HERE to read all your Parade favorites including Hollywood Wire, Celebrity interviews and photo galleries, Food recipes and cooking tips, Games and lots more.