Published: April 15, 2008 10:48 am            

DRINKWALTER: Guess what? Taxing the taxed

If what they say is true, “There are only two things we have to do in life, die and pay taxes,” then is that why we are beginning to live so long? Now hear me out on this one. We are taught to work hard, acquire lots of “things” take good care of ourselves so we can live longer and longer and continue to work hard and acquire more “things”. It seems to me the longer we live and accumulate, the more we have to give back to the government. That’s a pretty slick notion.

I recently read that life’s longevity coincides with your earnings, your level of education, and even your zip code. (I wonder where 14094 falls?)

True, you can’t take it with you. At the same time, all it takes is a bad fall or injury and a family can be immobilized. After a long life, when the family can no longer care for us, all we have worked hard for has to be forfeited so we can live in a facility that will care for our needs until we die. I am seeing that first hand, once again, with older family members and friends. It’s so very sad.

Barbara Walters recently hosted an ABC special titled, “Live to Be 150. Can You Do It?” There are 84,000 people in the United States that are over 100 years old. I know that a healthy diet and mental and physical activities seem to be the key to longevity, but I’m convinced that when it’s time to go, it’s time. No matter what we do or don’t do to prevent or encourage it, everyone dies eventually.

That brings me to the next point, paying taxes. It’s nearly April 15th; time to pay the piper for round one. I received an interesting e-mail that I thought was quite appropriate to share today. Here is a portion of what it read:

Tax truth

Tax his bed, tax the table at which he’s fed. Tax his tractor, tax his mule. Teach him taxes are the rule. Tax his cow, tax his goat. Tax his pants, tax his coat. Tax his ties,

tax his shirt. Tax his work, tax his dirt. Tax his tobacco, tax his drink. Tax him if he

tries to think. Tax his cigars, tax his beers. If he cries, then tax his tears.

Tax his car, tax his gas. Find other ways to tax his *ss .Tax all he has then let him know

that you won’t be done till he has no dough. When he screams and hollers, tax him more. Tax him till he’s good and sore. Then tax his coffin; tax his grave. Tax the sod in which he’s laid. Put these words upon his tomb, “Taxes drove me to my doom...”

When he’s gone, do not relax, It’s time to apply the inheritance tax.

Excise Taxes, Federal Income Tax, Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA), Fishing License Tax, Food License Tax, Fuel Permit Tax, Gasoline Tax, Gross Receipts Tax, Hunting License Tax, Inheritance Tax, Inventory Tax, IRS Interest Charges, IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax), Liquor Tax, Luxury Taxes, Marriage License Tax, Medicare Tax, Personal Property Tax, Property Tax, Real Estate Tax, etc…(author unknown)

The list went on, but you get the gist of it. Well, I guess it’s true, the government giveth and the government taketh away. Oh, and don’t spend that huge economic stimulus check all in one place. (I wonder if that will be taxable income when we do our 2008 taxes next year?) Oh well, life goes on or maybe not, but taxes do go on forever.

Deb Drinkwalter is a Lockport resident. Her column appears every Sunday. Send comments to d.drinkwalter@yahoo.com.

        

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