Lockport Union-Sun & Journal Online

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October 31, 2013

VALLEY: This is what I'm thinking

This is what I'm thinking ...


Lockport Union-Sun & Journal — Speaking of which, I never remember any politically correct do-gooder complaining about how insensitive it was to do such. 

And before I totally depart from baseball, let me add, it’s getting to the point of insufferable, listening to announcer Tim McCarver. Saturday I heard him say, “The pitcher ... (pause) ... is trying to entice the hitter ... (pause) ... to hit the ball hard ... (pause) ... so he can get the double play.” 

Yeah, sure, Tim. I’m certain if you talk to the pitcher after the game, he’d tell you how much he was trying to “entice” the batter into hitting the ball hard.

When McCarver isn’t saying some of the most asinine things I ever heard, he’s making the obvious sound like an insightful revelation. “The reason the catcher turns his glove like that is because he’s trying to catch the ball.” Wow, such an epiphany. 

In other news: Why do they still make pennies when they cost 1.7 cents to make? 

True story: A lady came up to me a few weeks ago and asked me if I was the guy who wrote this very newspaper column. When I told her I was, she said she recognized me from the photo that accompanies the article. Then she quipped, “You don’t look anything like your picture.”

What does one say back to someone who says “You don’t look anything like your picture!”? How are you supposed to react to that?

OK, it’s your turn. I’ll give you 1.7 cents for your thoughts.

And that’s the way it looks from the Valley.

Tom Valley is a strict conformist from Medina who never follows the rules. Reachable at Tvalley@rochester.rr.com.

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