Published: August 06, 2008 01:15 pm            

VALLEY: He broke everything but par

My buddy, Ralph, called me today. He’s been a good friend of mine for almost 40 years. We used to golf together, but not so much anymore. Since he has no chance of reading this, it’s safe to tell you why.

Seriously, would you like to play with someone who is always cheating? Someone who kicks his ball to get better position? Someone who doesn’t count all of his strokes and coughs while you’re putting? Huh, would ya?

Well, neither would he.

Two summers ago, Ralph and I would golf together about once a week. One day, I couldn’t go and he went out to shoot a round with his neighbor. He called after they had finished to let me know that he had gotten a hole-in-one. True story — he really did! Naturally, he was excited — as was I, for my friend.

“Congratulations, Ralph,” I offered. “I wish I’d been there to witness that.”

“Never would of gotten it if you were there,” he shot back. “I’m so used to keeping my eye on you, I would never have been able to concentrate.”

This coming from a guy who can hit a ball into the center of a pond, walk over to the edge of the water and “miraculously” find it on dry land — with a clear shot to the green. He also had the unique ability to drive the ball 50 yards into the woods, hit a tree, have it bounce back into the center of the fairway and say with a straight face, “Just the way I played it.”

I once asked Ralph while we were playing if he thought I could get to the green from where my ball was with a five iron.

“Eventually,” he deadpanned.

About a year and half ago, he moved back to his hometown area which is a couple hours away from here. He started to play golf with his nephews and some of his old buddies that he’d left behind many years ago. And like today, he’d call every now and then just to keep in touch.

Always the competitor, this 66-year-old ex-Marine excelled at keeping up with his young nephews. But last year while golfing, he had a freakish accident with the golf cart flipping over. He ended up with a busted hip, broken ribs and badly bruised shoulder. It looked as though his body would no longer be able to keep up with the competitive fire that raged so intensely inside.

After the accident, his wife Barb called to tell me about it. She said he wanted to talk to me — and so, she put him on the phone. My heart sank when I heard his voice. He was weak; it was a voice I wasn’t used to hearing. I can’t say he sounded defeated — because that image doesn’t sit well when thinking of Ralph — but he did sound like he’d lost a small battle and was willing to retreat for a while. Complete concession wasn’t in this man’s vocabulary.

I’d not talked to him in the past several months and so, today when he called I was elated.

“It’s good to hear your voice! You sound great!” I told him. I was surprised with the energy that I heard coming from the other end of the line; I shouldn’t have been.

“I feel good, too,” he replied. “And guess what, I played golf today!” he said, answering his own question.

I was astonished and I was glad for him — Ralph was back to his old self.

“There’s more,” he added. “I got another hole-in-one today.”

“Are you kidding me?” And, no, he wasn’t. He did it, again!

“Ralph,” I asked. “How can you swing a club, let alone get a hole-in-one? After breaking your ribs, your hip and shoulder — that’s amazing. You had me thinking you might not even walk again.”

“Just the way I played it,” he smirked.

Ralph really was back to his old self. And I couldn’t be happier for my friend.

That’s the way it looks from the Valley.

Tom Valley is a Medina resident. His column runs every Thursday. Write to Tvalley@rochester.rr.com.

        

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